Polishing Introductions & Conclusions for a Portfolio November 16, 2009
Posted by jhicks in : CORE, Content, Essay Planning, Portfolio , comments closedBeginnings and endings are difficult whether in a relationship, on a vacation, or in an essay! If you’re unsure of what steps to take beyond error corrections as you polish a final draft or revision, here are some techniques you can apply to your entrance and exit.
Introduction (1) If you used the “funnel” or “pyramid” method, check to see if you began with generalizations that are very far from your actual topic. Try cutting the first two sentences, for example. Now add more lines directly related to your thesis.
(2) Did you begin with a quote? Be sure you actually refer to it by name and develop ideas from it in your introduction. Also, let us know the author or credentials of the author as related to your topic.
(3) Is your introduction too short in relation to the length of the essay? Try to add more depth . . .Why is exploring this thesis important . . .Why are you pairing these very different texts together . . . Are you exploring questions people have always wondered about? Take time to discuss ideas like these to convince us you have thought about the thesis and its relationship to other ideas, times, people, or events.
(4) Is the thesis complete? Include nouns and phrases to name specifics, rather than making the reader encounter the specifics later. So, take out “. . .has many effects” and name the effects in your thesis. Don’t worry about giving away the “plot”!
Conclusion–Don’t worry about the rule of avoiding new ideas in the conclusion; instead, think about adding depth to show your brain power. Include the “so what” of your thesis. (1) Why is your analysis important? What effect does your argument have in your life or your reader’s? (2) Suggest other related research or ideas that need exploration. (3) Do modern readers see this idea, issue, or literary work differently than in former times? If so, what does that say about its significance? (4) How might life be different if we accept or reject your argument? Picture it for us.
Ending your Paper: Finding the “So what?” –Download for more ideas!
Love in Context November 9, 2009
Posted by egutierrez in : CORE, Essay Planning, Love Unit, Uncategorized , comments closedAs CORE students you’re probably either writing, making revisions, or finalizing your paper on love. Remember that this paper, like the first paper you wrote in CORE last semester, is a personal narrative and a reflection about a particular theme in action, in this case love.
Think carefully about a particular time in your life or a particular relationship you’ve had that dealt intimately with love in one of its many forms, such as philia or agape. Although your professor would like you to think about other forms of love besides romantic love, you might try looking at some of these relationships for interactions between these other forms of love as well.
Interesting stories usually have some element of personal transformation or triumph over adversity, so try thinking about a time that either you or someone you know experienced a kind of profound transformation or perseverance. Analyze this situation in terms of love: What forms of love are at play? Did love have any effect on the outcome in question? What were these effects? Could you or that person have transformed or triumphed without love? If you know of a story like this, tell it!
What makes this paper so useful and so timely is that it allows you to explore the various dynamics and nuances of love without many constraints. Take this opportunity to explore your own experiences and views of love in the context of your life, and don’t be afraid to venture out and make novel claims about it (so long as you back it up with evidence). This paper helps make what was previously a more abstract study of love more concrete by applying it to your own life and your own unique experiences. Explore, and have fun with it!
EG
The Freedom to Write November 1, 2009
Posted by lundquistthe3rd in : CORE, Essay Planning, Getting started , comments closedBeginning an essay or paper where the professor encourages you to define your own topic, either with no restrictions or within a very very general framework, can be quite intimidating at first. I say “at first” because once you learn to channel your energy, writing can become an activity from which it is hard to pull yourself away.
Here I will address a few things that work for me. They are things that I was originally encouraged to do in high school and have stuck with me ever since. When I was a sophomore in high school, I hated writing. I cringed whenever we were given an assignment. It wasn’t until my teacher told me, “Write on any topic you choose. The topic does not have to be ‘academic’ per say or common at all. ” I went to her to get more specifics and she asked me a few questions:
- “What are you passionate about?” Music, I answered without hesitation.
- “What type of music?” Metal, I said.
- “Is there a specific band or aspect of this music you would like to learn/teach people about?” (This assignment was supposed to be a highly-detailed research paper.) I’m not interested in teaching others at this point, but I want to learn about several specific bands. That would be cool, I said.
- She then sent me off to narrow these bands in which I was interested down to one.
- I came back, having decided, and she sent me off to find articles, interviews, and other resources concerning the band.
From there on out, things went fairly well for the first major paper that I would call my own. I came to find out that the band I picked also happened to take very strong stands on different social and political issues. To top that off, I found that I agreed strongly with their stances on these issues. Before long I had too much information for the length of the paper we were supposed to do. Then I had to narrow things down, but too much is always better than not enough.
I think the key step is asking “What are you passionate about?” or “In what area do you have or want to have specific interest or knowledge?” These are questions which will quickly get you on a streamlined path towards finding your research and writing your paper.
Although not everyone is likely to fall into the category of ‘passionate,’ each of us has something that is very important to us. Even if your life philosophy is apathy, there is still something valuable to be said or to explore towards that end. There are others who can and will learn from your words and experiences. There are always new things to learn about your areas of interest. Almost always the process of this learning opens you up to even more.
THE BLUE LIGHT show: A Long Way Gone Discussion October 23, 2009
Posted by willmeister in : CORE, Core paper #3, MP3s , add a commentThis mp3 episode of the Blue Light Show is devoted to A Long Way Gone. Three CORE students discuss ideas relevant to paper #2.
Is the book more about war or enlightenment? Why do the boys join the army? How does enlightenment occur, and what the responsibilities of the enlightened? Can family be replaced? Why is music so prominent in the text–How does it become a metaphor?
Ali McLaughlin, John Moldenhauer, and Philip Feldwisch, as well as moderator William Milhans provide serious talk about a thought-provoking text.
If you would like to save the file, please simply right-click on the ‘download’ link, and selected ‘Save Link Location As’, or the equivalent.
THE BLUE LIGHT show: Genesis Reading September 3, 2009
Posted by jhicks in : CORE, MP3s, Origins Unit, Text & Context , comments closedCORE students . . .This podcast is a reading of your assignment from Genesis. We *totally* took advantage of the sound effects and music to create a space for the story to come to life in the oral tradition from which it came. Let the language wash over you as you relax or exercise. Consider ideas to explore in your first paper.
THE BLUE LIGHT show: Old Man Coyote discussion September 3, 2009
Posted by willmeister in : CORE, MP3s, Origins Unit , add a commentIn this episode of the BLUE LIGHT SHOW, those masters of mirth and malady, William and Kayla, decipher the intricate mysteries of “Old Man Coyote Makes the World” [Crow]. They compliment, they dis, they ponder and invite you to enter the conversation.To listen, click the gray slide arrow; to copy, right click “download” and select “Save Link As.”
THE BLUE LIGHT show: Corn Mother discussion September 3, 2009
Posted by willmeister in : CORE, MP3s, Origins Unit , add a commentIn this episode of the the BLUE LIGHT SHOW, William and Kayla tackle “Corn Mother.” On this smoke-free campus, what do they make of tobacco being a “gift”? William ponders how the Penobscot deities differ from the Greek gods and superheroes. Kayla knocks William for a Harry Potter reference.To play, click the gray slide; to copy, right click on “download” and select “Save Link As.”
Welcome Freshman Writers–That’s You! August 27, 2009
Posted by jhicks in : CORE, Text & Context , comments closedThe Writing Center has great support for CORE and Text and Context! We know the texts and and love to talk about them as you prepare your essays.
Several of our consultants have taken CORE, are anxious to hear about your first few days on campus, and are looking forward to getting to know freshmen.
Christ College freshmen . . .you’ll find upperclass CC students as consultants. In fact, we have “CC Thursdays and Fridays” with consultants on hand. Spread out your laptop, notes, and coffee. CC writing consultants will be near by for individual or group consultations. Test a thesis, read aloud, or improve “flow” with us.
When at your computer at night Sunday – Thursday, come online with questions or a rant from 9 PM-10:30 PM. IM a consultant from http://www.valpo.edu/writingcenter.
Quotes Should be Working for You August 26, 2009
Posted by jhicks in : CORE, Citation & bibliography, Education Unit, Love Unit, Quoting , comments closedA quote is a powerful enforcer in your writing. The direct quote should underscore and clarify a point you have written about; it should not be doing the explaining for you. So, always summarize a quote before or after you use it. (Otherwise, you readers may think you don’t understand the quote or how it applies.)
Secondly, impress the reader with the authority of the quote. In your sentences tell something about the source–maybe the source is a well-known person like former president Jimmy Carter, or has an impressive title like Surgeon General, or perhaps the name of the article is the most impressive like “Annual Energy Outlook 2007″ from the US government Energy Information Administration. No one cares about the actual author, in this case. The title is the convincing part.
You’re probably thinking, what about the citation and bibliography? Isn’t all that information there? Yes, but your text is convincing if you show that you were able to interpret the significance of the sources, not just stick a few ideas together with some quotes. Your role as writer is to digest and interpret for the reader, not just find. And, anything you put in the text, you can omit from the parenthetical citation–in MLA or APA.
For examples, see this short how-to from us: How to Use Quotes, Paraphrases, and Summaries Effectively
Show More, Tell Less . . .Revising Narrative August 25, 2009
Posted by jhicks in : CORE, Editing, Handouts, Love Unit, Style , comments closedHow many times have you heard this writing advice: Show us, don’t tell us. Readers prefer action over narrative so they can picture events as they may have happened. But how do you carry out this advice? You have already used adjectives and adverbs and told what happened . . .but this still may be telling, not showing.
With a few additions, you can easily revamp a passage to show.
(1) Add dialog: Let people talk to show their feelings and motives.
(2) Add movement: Let people move around to show what’s happening and what they’re thinking. You can imply many complex ideas with through people’s actions.
(3) Add examples that show: Give readers more than one example. In fact, this might be where you can add the dialog and action.
(4) Replace “is/are” verbs with verbs that show action: grabbed, argued, flung, considered, extolled, worried, announced, etc.
Compare these two paragraphs in this pdf–These examples will show you the idea, rather than our just telling you the steps! how-to-show-more-tell-less.pdf
CORE tip: Apply these techniques to revisions of your creation narrative paper. Maybe showing more will bring it to life.