Anyone that knows me is fully aware of the fear that I hold towards the “real world.” Going into my senior year at Valpo, the interrogation of what I am doing after graduation is in full swing. While I am still at the point where I cringe when I sense the conversation heading in that direction, I am beginning to feel comfortable in my answer: “I don’t really know, but I’m trying to figure it out.” I don’t hide the fact I am nervous about the future, but I know being afraid of the future will not help me figure things out. Be that as it may, this internship is serving as a stepping-stone for my career, as well as being largely empowering.

During a meeting last week, my boss once again triggered my excitement to work in community development. We were discussing the upcoming focus group conversations when my boss affirmed, “You’re in charge of changing the face of the community.” At that point, as much as I enjoy my project, I was beginning to feel exhausted by the extensive research aspect of the initiative. Not being from LaPorte County and having no prior investment set in the county was clouding my enthusiasm for the job. I lost sight of the final goal and I forfeited the fact we are creating community change.

I can only blame myself for allowing that to happen and after that meeting I felt rejuvenated. An hour after the meeting I kept repeating those words said by my boss to myself and while I would be repeating those words, I would picture groups of people with smiling faces in my head; I was back in the game. It also worked out that the next day, the interns got a pretty cool intern task to complete.

Garrett and I went to the beach this past Friday; it was a beautiful day with just enough heat to make a person look for the ice cream truck. We were assigned the task of handing out United Way beach balls to as many beach-goers as possible; we stuffed un-inflated beach balls into these handy-dandy gym bags and were on our way. With the beach only a block away, it was a perfect job for a sunny Friday afternoon. Looking out on all the people enjoying their day, I could not help but be nervous; how were people going to react to some random girl come over and hand out a beach ball? I was anticipating the majority of people to be skeptical, to shoo me away with angry eyes.

United at the Beach

After giving away over thirty beach balls and talking with more than a handful of people about United Way community engagement, however, my hard feelings lifted. While my feet were in undeniable pain due to the incredibly hot sand, my mood was indisputably sanguine. I did not assist people in signing up for volunteer hours, I did not contribute to any major service event, but I did give people a gateway to community action. I presented people with an opportunity to create change by individual engagement. When we made our way back to the office, the smile on my face was long lasting and my face was gleaming (partially due to the sweat, but mainly due to excitement).

I anticipate the upcoming year will be filled with triumphs and losses, along with scary crossroads; but something that I do know for sure is that this opportunity to work for the United Way of LaPorte County, as well as being part of the CAPS Fellows Program in general, has given me ample skills that I intend to use regularly from this point on.

Live United,

Grace