My internship with the Harrison Center has held countless surprises, lessons, and memories. Looking back on all of it (the good and the not-so-good), I wouldn’t change how any of it played out– mostly because everything I’ve learned has been one more puzzle piece I can add to my unknown, post-graduation future. One of my most unexpected epiphanies didn’t make itself known until my last couple of weeks in Indy but it greatly affected that span of time.

I didn’t anticipate becoming apathetic to writing– blog writing that is. I know it’s a bit meta and ironic with this being a blog post but between the Harrison Center and the freelance writing I do for an addiction recovery center, this reliable use of my Creative Writing degree has grown less appetizing. Upon reflection, I think what’s deflated my love for blog-writing-as-a-career, has been the way it has zapped my energy and interest in independently writing creatively; the original intent behind my business and sales writing was to give me enough financial stability to be able to pursue my personal writing endeavors.

A non-blog-writing project I initiated this summer!

I know that there are many other financially-plausible options that my Creative Writing degree could open up for me (e.g., editing and proofreading, layout and design, ghostwriting, graduate school, etc.) but I’d always kind of banked on freelance content and sales writing since I’ve already gotten my foot or at least a few toes into that door.

From a big picture perspective, I know that I would end up feeling lethargic about any task that took up 40+ hours of my week or really anything mentally-demanding by the end of the summer– but I’d be lying if I said this apathy hasn’t been slightly alarming. Granted, I know I have a tendency to get too caught up in the spiraling tale of “what ifs” but as I explained in my previous CAPS blog post, it is okay because that’s just a part of my process.

At my first meeting with my amazing mentor, Lindsay Bledsoe, she imparted upon me some advice that she herself had recently received and benefited from. In regards to pursuing a creative career, she said that “sometimes you have to make art and sometimes you have to make money.” While this was initially a bit of a buzzkill to my barely 3-weeks of interning honeymoon phase, it’s stuck with me and resurfaced as relevant many times throughout this summer.

I had already had some experience with this hard lesson, as I struggled the past school year to release from my freelance writing the high expectations I put on all of my personal and academic endeavors. But I had underestimated how much more difficult it would be to establish a routine and mindset that would allow me to evenly ration out my writing energy. I know that as someone looking to make a career out of my creativity, it will be an ongoing search to find that  balance between upholding my artistic standards, self-fulfillment, and making money.

These amazing friends have kept me inspired and sane this summer!