I would like to invite you into a journaling activity this week.  We at the Institute for Leadership and Service like to promote reflection.  We think of it as a muscle we can exercise.  You know, how strong muscles are just kind of “nice to have” until one day when you need to move a couch or pick up a child, and then those muscles become absolutely necessary.  Similarly, reflection may seem superfluous, until the day we kind of just need to know what we think about a subject. OK, the reflection activity.  Get out a writing instrument and your journal, or a piece of paper, or the back of a napkin. First, write down where you are from.  You decide if that means, city, state, country, etc, but I mean a geographical place. Next, think of something about that place that is meaningful to you.  Spend a little time […]

Over the course of this summer and my internship at Erie House, one thing has became ever more clear to me each time I wake up and head to work: any number of individually insignificant factors can decide whether or not it’ll feel like a good day. For example, it could be cloudy but not raining, my bus is on time, and I have an extra minute to grab coffee before I clock in. That’s already a good day. Just as much, if it’s raining without an umbrella, both of my bus rides get delayed, and I have to show up twenty minutes late, that’s kind of a rough start. Any one of those single elements shouldn’t be enough to make or break a day, but taken together, they pile up quickly. And, of course, that’s just the first hour or two of your standard weekday. If you’re in the […]

As my internship continues, I continue looking for a purpose big enough to dominate my life. I’ve always loved reading and since childhood, narratives of grand proportions filled my head, so much so that I’ve come to expect my purpose to be similar to the same characters that had populated my life. Frequently I find myself looking for a purpose big enough to dominate my own life or appear on some metaphorical horizon. I had expected to see something like a summer thunderhead marching across the sky, or maybe something far away but with a promise of grandeur like the Chicago skyline as seen from the Indiana Dunes National Park. This summer, and especially the CAPS internship has set my mind on a future that I am typically happy to ignore. My previous blog post mainly talked about my refusal to truly think about vocation in a real sense, but […]

Today is my last day of my CAPS summer fellowship at Heartland Alliance. I look around the office. It’s quiet, a normal Friday morning as people mostly elect to work remotely before the weekend. Regardless, while everyone goes about their day, I sit here reflecting on some of the things I have learned this summer about both the work I have gotten to be a part of in refugee resettlement and as part of a non-profit at large in Chicago, IL. I once asked my supervisor the question, “how does Heartland approach the problems it wants to solve?”, and she gave me an answer I did not expect. For those that may not be familiar, Heartland Alliance’s mission is to resettle newly arrived refugees and immigrants in Chicagoland with the goal of helping them to become self-sufficient. My question about its “approach” could have yielded a number of answers.  Her […]

‘I don’t know.’: the response that never feels good enough. Whether it is an answer to what you want, why you started, or what you plan for the future, few leave a conversation satisfied when you say ‘I don’t know’. But I, personally, don’t know a lot of things. I am a very indecisive person; I like to do a lot of things, and I don’t mind doing a lot of things, so, while some people might call me a people pleaser, I would say I’m just really adaptable. I want what others want because I would be content with either. Being so flexible is great a lot of the time; I’m reliable, understanding, good at sharing, good at listening, good at conflict resolution, and the list goes on. But that also means, I have a hard time setting boundaries, and don’t always receive the same grace I give others. […]

As a result of my time ending at Jacob’s Ladder, I have been given a chance to shift my focus from getting the most out of my experience to reflecting on everything that I’ve learned and what it means. Throughout my summer at Jacob’s Ladder, I had the pleasure of learning many lessons, though the ones that stick out the most to me are the ability to walk into new experiences with an open mind and heart and not to put too much emphasis on my expectations.  I believe that it’s completely normal to have expectations and a mental checklist of things that we want to accomplish when entering a new environment or experience. It’s a way to hold ourselves accountable and a way to maximize what we’re learning. Even though having expectations is essentially inevitable, I have come to realize that expectations can limit us and put us in […]

A lot of people think that I am a shy person. But really, I am just an anxious person, and that results in me thinking and rethinking through any possible implications and consequences of any actions or words before doing or saying them. And when I do not pre-think through them, I will post-think through them afterwards. Or both, which can really slow an interaction. Shockingly enough, that kind of hesitation comes across as shy. As I have gotten older and worked on it, this pattern of thinking and hesitation have been steadily decreasing. And this summer specifically, I have gotten to practice a new mentality surrounding social interaction that has really helped. It started at the beginning of the summer. On maybe my second day, one of my supervisors took me to a meeting with her where she was planning an awareness event with a few other representatives of […]

Just like at Valpo, the Grünewald Guild has a walking labyrinth outside, just beyond their central building and right next to the river. Anyone can use it at any point of the day, or night even. I actually heard from someone that they went out to walk it at night and stargaze. We use it during our final Vespers service of each program week too; to meditate on all the things we’ve learned from the week, to center ourselves and find a few minutes of peace and quiet inside our busy bodies. This last week, I started to really pay attention to how the labyrinth walk made me feel in the moment. It’s a triple-spiral, which can mean a lot of things to people depending on their spiritualities, but as you move through the labyrinth, you pass by the spirals you already walked. I’ve been doing a lot of personal […]

As of late July, I have served as a Communications Intern at Grünewald Guild in Leavenworth, WA for two months as part of my placement as a member of the CAPS Fellows Program. Through working in this position, I have exponentially grown to further refine my vision for my vocation as I approach the final year of my academic career at Valparaiso University. The mission of the guild is highlighted through the three core values of art, faith, and community and, since I am a Music and English major, I initially thought I would gravitate my attention mostly towards the value of art during my time here. Surprisingly, that was not that case and I started to primarily focus upon the aspect of community involvement and how it uniquely manifests itself at this non-profit organization. By nature, I have more of an introverted demeanor and it often takes me a […]

Reconnecting with my high school viola teacher after three years brought up her valid question of, “Any updates with what you want to do with your life?” When I replied, “Well, I want to apply for programs to study or teach in another country for a year… Then possibly grad school for something ‘international’…” we both had to pause and laugh; nothing had changed in the three years since we’d last talked. I still didn’t have a set plan. Driving home that afternoon to get back to work with the Valparaiso International Center (VIC), I questioned everything. Why I still didn’t know, why I still didn’t have everything figured out. The following day, my CAPS interview project changed my perspective on everything. For my CAPS interview, I met with Hugh McGuigan, VIC Board President but also a Valparaiso University legend, and hearing about his adventures and international experiences made me […]

As I near the end of my time at Jacob’s Ladder, I am once again given the chance to reflect on the different experiences and opportunities I have been given this summer. Among all the different opportunities that I have had at my placement, the ones that stick out the most to me are those where I could attend other meetings/events in the community. All of the events that I attended gave me the chance to meet new people, have meaningful discussions with others, and learn new information. These events helped me get out of my comfort zone and learn new information that I will carry with me far beyond my time at Jacob’s Ladder.  One of my favorite events that I got to attend was a collaborative meeting with other organizations in Porter County that serve the 0-3-year-old age group. This event served as an opportunity for different non-profit […]

At the beginning of June, I moved to a town I had never visited, to live in a house I had never seen, and to work with people I had only spoken to over Zoom. My family dropped me off, and once I had all of my things arranged, I sat on the bed and had a strange but very familiar feeling wash over me: What do I do now?  I had the whole night ahead of me, but everyone I know and everything I do was scattered everywhere but here. The empty span of time ahead of me felt dizzying. So, I just sat there in the what-now feeling, thinking. I began to think about why this feeling was so familiar to me, and I thought of all of the other transitions I have had like this throughout my whole life: from the five times I moved as a […]

As my internship draws to a close, I’m faced with the same question that I begin the internship with. Why am I working with an environmental non-profit, what difference could I ever make? After all, some of the largest companies in the world will still produce overwhelming amounts of waste byproduct, people will continue to toss their trash out their car window, and large chunks of plastic will always dot our beaches like sick leaves on a dying plant. Trees will be replaced by light poles, native plants by decorative shrubs. Those involved with environmental activism will still bravely stand their ground against those who couldn’t care less and have more money than most people could ever imagine. Quite frankly, my voice seems quite small amid the roaring of those who know more, have more, ARE more than me. In a world where it is much easier to do nothing than […]

As I sit down to write this blog post, one realization crosses my mind. It is the realization that time keeps marching forward, and that is especially true when it comes to summer and my placement. As of the first week of July, I have officially hit the halfway mark of my duties serving Opportunity Enterprises and Camp Lakeside. The phrases “Time flies when you’re having fun” and “You never truly appreciate what you have until it’s gone” perfectly define and encompass what this experience has been. As I look back at what I have accomplished, a lot of it hasn’t felt as actual work. This is not only true for myself, but also for the campers and staff that I interact with on a daily basis. While much of my job is done behind the scenes, I also have many opportunities throughout the week to interact with campers in […]

We often hear the phrase “don’t make excuses, make improvements”. For many, this may be a difficult thing to be told – this kind of statement misses and overlooks the individual nuances and circumstances of the situation we find ourselves in. But despite these challenges, we now find ourselves forced to continue on with no acknowledgement of them. Although I was not aware that I could have a new perspective on this idea, my time so far working in refugee and immigrant resettlement at Heartland Alliance has brought me one. But before I analyze that piece further, I want to take you through my time so far as an intern on the employment team. As I onboarded remotely during my first week, rather than being assigned training to do on the side, I was immediately put on meaningful tasks: calling refugees and immigrants involved with Heartland’s programs (referred to as […]

Now that I have over a month of my CAPS fellowship under my belt, it is easy to slip into a routine and let the day-to-day pass by quickly, and without much thought. May and June were a blur of emails back and forth, numerous to-do lists scribbled on Post-it notes, Zoom call meetings, and countless hours of staring at my computer screen. Don’t get me wrong, I am enjoying the work I’m doing and staying busy throughout the long summer days. I enjoy my lists and checking off projects as I complete them. But lately, a little voice in my head has reminded me of the importance of recognizing the small moments of purpose and slowing down before the summer comes to a close. Recently, I am grateful to have had two distinct moments that have not only forced me to slow down and reflect but also that have […]

Curiosity killed the cat is a saying that I have heard throughout my child and young adult life. While it may be true in some situations, the age old saying takes away from what I believe to be one of humanities’ main functions, and that is to explore the unexplored. The Grunewald Guild is an art retreat center, located in the Cascade Mountains, that focuses on exploring the connection between art, faith, and community and how these pillars interact during the weeklong courses. I have had the wonderful opportunity to visit most of these course sessions and photograph them. When I have done this type of work in the past, I always had the feeling that I was a fly on the wall, trying to blend into the background as to not disturb the class. However, the classes here immediately incorporate me into their community. Sometimes the instructor will start […]

As a child, I loved attending a certain small festival in a downtown Valparaiso parking lot that sold trinkets from around the world. Maybe there were a couple performers singing melodies from other countries, or a food tent or two. What I didn’t know was that, years later, I would be working to put on that same festival, now celebrating its 15th anniversary and expecting to host 2,500 – 3,000 attendees in a unified celebration of international cultures. With the CAPS Fellows Program, I am interning with the Valparaiso International Center (VIC) in preparation for its annual World Cultural Festival, where I have already learned so much about event planning and the importance of relationships in community work. I believe the most eye-opening technical aspect of my internship so far has been realizing the sheer mountain of details that goes into planning an event. Focusing on just one area of […]

The easiest way to get to 1841 North Laramie Ave from Austin, Chicago by 10 AM every weekday without a car is to take the Green Line at Austin via Ashland/63rd, get off at Laramie & Lake, then take bus 57 towards Grand/Latrobe and get off at Laramie & Bloomingdale. In theory, this journey should only take about 33 minutes: a 5-minute walk to the station, a 12-minute train ride to Laramie & Lake, a 14-minute bus ride to Laramie & Bloomingdale, and a 2-minute walk north towards the building, meaning I could leave my house at 9:20 AM. Public transportation in Chicago is a rite of passage for newcomers. Despite its numerous benefits over private car usage, it can be difficult to navigate. I had visited Chicago a few times and only used the trains, which are easy to navigate with clear stations, platforms for delay and inactive train […]