Looking Back & Defining the Small Moments of Purpose

Now that I have over a month of my CAPS fellowship under my belt, it is easy to slip into a routine and let the day-to-day pass by quickly, and without much thought. May and June were a blur of emails back and forth, numerous to-do lists scribbled on Post-it notes, Zoom call meetings, and countless hours of staring at my computer screen. Don’t get me wrong, I am enjoying the work I’m doing and staying busy throughout the long summer days. I enjoy my lists and checking off projects as I complete them. But lately, a little voice in my head has reminded me of the importance of recognizing the small moments of purpose and slowing down before the summer comes to a close.

Recently, I am grateful to have had two distinct moments that have not only forced me to slow down and reflect but also that have reminded me of my purpose and calling. I had the privilege of attending the June Point of Contact meeting for the IU Health/American Red Cross Alliance in place of my supervisor, Colleen. These monthly meetings bring together the points of contact for the IU Health hospitals that are in the Red Cross Alliance to share upcoming volunteer opportunities and stay in the loop of everything going on.​​ This meeting was my first touchpoint with other members of the Alliance, and it allowed me to see the bigger picture of the work I am doing. I realized that the projects I’d been assigned to (an updated informational packet for the volunteers and a summer newsletter) were going to be distributed to all these hospitals and make a tangible impact on volunteers, both new and old. Being able to speak in the meeting and give updates both on what I was working on and what my supervisor told me to report, gave me a sense of purpose and importance that I was so desperately craving. The work I was doing mattered, and this moment solidified that reminder for me. Working remotely, it is hard to see the larger picture and the ripple effects that the work I’m doing has, so attending this meeting and feeling more ‘in-the-know’ gave me a brief yet tangible glimpse of the greater IU Health and American Red Cross Alliance.

The other moment occurred during my first meeting with my alumni mentor, Caroline. I wasn’t sure what to expect going into my call with Caroline, who is living on the other side of the world in London, working for a non-profit. However, the hour-long conversation I had with Caroline was vital in giving me clarity. I was honest with Caroline about how I was feeling and the lack of purpose I had been experiencing. She spoke the words I needed to hear, and I furiously scribbled in my planner next to me, soaking up every word (see picture). Caroline reminded me that at the end of the day, this is my internship, and I need to advocate for myself to have the experiences I want to have. She also encouraged me to lean into the parts of the internship that I did enjoy and to create more opportunities for myself. I had mentioned to her just how much I enjoyed the Point of Contact meeting and connecting with other people, and Caroline told me to continue to foster those connections and take the initiative to attend more of these meetings or even meet with these people individually. She told me about her own experiences with CAPS and the workforce and how oftentimes she has created her own work, which is more often than not encouraged and supported by a supervisor. Overall, Caroline reminded me that my purpose can be in my own hands, and I don’t have to just sit around and wait for it to come along. I can play an active role in shaping it how I want it to be.

Reflecting on these two experiences, I can now say that sometimes purpose is not always crystal clear and handed to you on a silver platter. Rather, it shows up in small, unexpected ways that surprisingly are sustainable to keep you going, even if the work feels repetitive or useless. Those moments can be easily overlooked, so I’ve begun to truly revere the importance of pausing, taking a step back, and looking at the bigger picture. Journaling frequently throughout the CAPS process has been especially helpful, as it has forced me to not only recount my experiences but look back and see how they’ve shaped me and my purpose. I can read back my entries and see just how far I’ve come and how the purpose I’ve recognized and shaped has evolved throughout the summer so far. I am so grateful for the small moments that have become significant in developing who I am and why I’m here. I’m looking forward to the rest of the summer, the work I’ll do, and the little moments of purpose to come!

 

  • Grace Roberts, American Red Cross

 

 

The Mystery is Worth Chasing

Curiosity killed the cat is a saying that I have heard throughout my child and young adult life. While it may be true in some situations, the age old saying takes away from what I believe to be one of humanities’ main functions, and that is to explore the unexplored.

The Grunewald Guild is an art retreat center, located in the Cascade Mountains, that focuses on exploring the connection between art, faith, and community and how these pillars interact during the weeklong courses. I have had the wonderful opportunity to visit most of these course sessions and photograph them. When I have done this type of work in the past, I always had the feeling that I was a fly on the wall, trying to blend into the background as to not disturb the class. However, the classes here immediately incorporate me into their community. Sometimes the instructor will start explaining the work that the students are doing or even offer me some of their snacks, so they were not tempted to eat them later! Overall, they were curious to learn about my work and my history.

My time living in an intentional working community has presented many mysteries to explore. I learned only a portion of what it takes to live in a community that cares for itself and exists on deeper level than purely social interactions. One lesson I learned is that communication is key to live in harmony with one another and nature. For example, a staff member alerted the rest of the staff of a small black bear living near one of the trails that connects portions of the Guild’s campus. Naturally I wanted to stay away from the bear but a part of me wanted to catch a glimpse of the animal. In this case curiosity might have put me in harm’s way which is why I am choosing to write about that curiosity instead of chasing after the bear.

To extrapolate the point further, my time at the Guild has pushed me to lean into the curious nature of the human spirit. To chase the mysteries that life holds. Within my conversations between staff and guests, I have learned that it is easy to fall into the trap of a content and comfy life, but that lack of curiosity in life leads to a lack of creativity, key component of unique problem solving. 

Having a strong sense of curiosity has allowed the students of the Guild to strengthen their sense of community with not only other students but staff as well. There are so many lessons to be learned that would not be shown the light of day if it were not for a curious person asking a question.

With all this being said, I urge the readers of this blog to keep chasing the mystery in life. Why did you choose to wear those colors today? What are you chasing after? Please don’t limit yourself to life as you know it because who knows what the world offers for you to explore.

-Corey McClure, Grunewald Guild

Full Circle Moments and Community in Valparaiso

“Jasmine Dancers”: This image from last year’s World Cultural Festival features the Jasmine Dancers traditional Chinese dance group and hints at the wonderful performances this year’s festival has in store.

As a child, I loved attending a certain small festival in a downtown Valparaiso parking lot that sold trinkets from around the world. Maybe there were a couple performers singing melodies from other countries, or a food tent or two. What I didn’t know was that, years later, I would be working to put on that same festival, now celebrating its 15th anniversary and expecting to host 2,500 – 3,000 attendees in a unified celebration of international cultures. With the CAPS Fellows Program, I am interning with the Valparaiso International Center (VIC) in preparation for its annual World Cultural Festival, where I have already learned so much about event planning and the importance of relationships in community work.

I believe the most eye-opening technical aspect of my internship so far has been realizing the sheer mountain of details that goes into planning an event. Focusing on just one area of festival preparation, I’ve come to see that, no matter how amazing the day-of setup is, nothing matters without marketing. After all, if people don’t know about the event, they won’t come. VIC founder Duane Davison explained to me that we need to meet people in every place that they exist in the community.

So I’ve worked with a professional graphic designer to put an ad in a magazine, and we will soon release our festival’s poster design to be posted in cafés, stores, libraries, and even VU’s campus. I am also putting together a social media plan, and the VIC is including billboard ads for the first time in their marketing. By far, my favorite way we plan to get the public involved is having our first-ever float in Valparaiso’s Popcorn Festival Parade. Helping design one of the larger-than-life popcorn floats I’ve loved seeing all my childhood is truly a full-circle moment.

Working with the VIC has also shown me the importance of understanding relationships in the community. Nothing happens in a vacuum, and putting on this event has required participation from everyone from the Chamber of Commerce to the local library to Menards. I’ve met with individuals of all sorts of backgrounds and personalities, and  I’ve been surprised by how much I’ve enjoyed this in-person work. I believe this internship has nudged me in the direction of looking for a career that includes lots of social interaction. I’ve also learned to look for the humanity and beauty in the “non-efficient” parts of workday interactions, whether they be meandering topics of conversation during a meeting or attending non-work events with fellow VIC members.

I remember in particular one evening when I drove out to our warehouse with others from the VIC team to take inventory of and clean our festival banners. However, we ended up spending an hour weeding an adjacent garden and talking about family, travel, and all sorts of topics. Looking back, I deeply valued this evening in the sunset garden as an authentic human blip in an otherwise work-driven world. Taking time for conversation is healing for the soul, and I hope to take this value of relationship-building with me into any future profession.

My elementary school self would have never guessed that, one day, I would be helping put on the World Cultural Festival I loved going to every year. Now, I find it hard to believe how fast the summer is flying by, and how every day uncovers a new aspect of this community I thought I had all figured out.

Come join the VIC for our World Cultural Festival on Sunday, September 15, 2024, from 12pm-5pm in Valparaiso’s Central Park Plaza!

  • Lucia Otten, Valparaiso International Center

Acceptance, and bus rides

The easiest way to get to 1841 North Laramie Ave from Austin, Chicago by 10 AM every weekday without a car is to take the Green Line at Austin via Ashland/63rd, get off at Laramie & Lake, then take bus 57 towards Grand/Latrobe and get off at Laramie & Bloomingdale. In theory, this journey should only take about 33 minutes: a 5-minute walk to the station, a 12-minute train ride to Laramie & Lake, a 14-minute bus ride to Laramie & Bloomingdale, and a 2-minute walk north towards the building, meaning I could leave my house at 9:20 AM.

Public transportation in Chicago is a rite of passage for newcomers. Despite its numerous benefits
over private car usage, it can be difficult to navigate. I had visited Chicago a few times and only used the trains, which are easy to navigate with clear stations, platforms for delay and inactive train updates, and CTA personnel available for inquiries. This time, however, I had to learn how to use the bus system, which was unfamiliar but could cut up to 20 minutes off my transit time. In other words, I missed at least one bus every day during the first week and boarded the wrong bus going in the wrong direction three times that same week. It was humbling.

At first, I was really annoyed with myself, wondering, “Why am I struggling with this? If I’ve triple-checked everything and still get on the wrong bus, what am I missing? Should I just Uber it?” Then, I became frustrated with the people around me who, despite hearing my struggle, offered no new
information on how to navigate the system. My frustration stemmed from insecurity. What is wrong with me that I can’t figure out how to use the system efficiently when so many others just seem to know?
While it didn’t overwhelm me, by the end of the week and the start of the next, I accepted that my
commute would be extra long until I could see the patterns in the system.

And I did. By the end of the second week, I knew everything: which buses to take, which ones
ran on time, which ones rarely showed up, and what time specific lines stopped running. It was liberating.

This experience with public transportation, however, is not uncommon. On the contrary, it is a shared
experience among those who aren’t Chicago natives. While I didn’t receive great advice the first week, I
did hear many stories of people having similar experiences and recounting the ridiculous adjustments they had to make when using the system.

As I recapped the week with my mom, it hit me. Every time I get a glimpse of what my calling
could be, insecurities chase me, and I find myself lost in the confusion and uncertainty, often aborting
missions. I prefer to take the Uber rather than figure out a system that could take 3, 4, or even 5 shortcuts to reach my destination. Realizing this, I started to be more aware of what I was avoiding at my internship and recognized that I haven’t been as open as I thought I was to this new and unfamiliar space. It was eye-opening but motivating.

Long story short, if I leave my house by 8:55 AM to catch the 9:06 AM train via Cottage Grove at
Austin Station—which goes in the same direction as Ashland/63rd and runs approximately every 6
minutes—I can transfer to bus 57 towards Grand/Latrobe at 9:25 AM. This bus always arrives on time,
unlike the 9:32 AM or 9:42 AM buses, which have spottier arrival times and more delays. Getting off at
Laramie & Bloomingdale, I’ll arrive at the office with 15 to 20 minutes to spare. During those spare
minutes, I take the time to prepare and create a list of goals for the day, reminding myself of what I want to achieve from this experience and how I will need to go about it, allowing the process to flow naturally.

-Noemi Vela, By the Hand

Being in the Moment

For my second blog in two weeks, I was really struggling to find an experience that I did not touch on the week before this. As I was reflecting on my summer, already at the halfway point of this experience with Jacob’s Ladder and the CAPS Fellowship, I was thinking about what is a lesson I have learned.

I feel that the biggest takeaway I have had is how much better of an experience is gained when you simply are present in the moment. In our world today, there are a million things that can distract you when you are bored or to pass the time. When I first started at Jacob’s Ladder, I often found my
mind wandering or thinking about how much time till lunch, or when I get to go home. It
was not that I was not enjoying the work, I was just distracted. I was really struggling
with this when I thought back to the key part of the CAPS Fellowship, reflection.

As I was reflecting on my first couple days, I knew I needed to figure out a way to be less distracted. I decided no matter what, I was gonna just throw myself at all the work I could possibly do and really focus. By week 2, I felt I was already improving. I noticed when I was doing administrational paperwork and doing therapy sessions with the patients at Jacob’s Ladder. I realized if I just focus on fully immersing myself in the work, time flies quickly and you end up enjoying the work even more.

This focus on being in the moment became key when we had a big deadline this past week for an important grant for our company. The deadline for the grant writing that myself, and another one of
the interns had to do, got moved up and we were in a time crunch. I felt stressed at first, but then I realized with what I had been practicing, it would be okay. By using the reflective portion of CAPS and just the need to improve, Natalie and I were able to get the grant done in plenty of time and we submitted it the next day.

CAPS has really improved my work habits and just understanding of myself through reflection, and how important being in the moment is.

  • Colin Graves, Jacob’s Ladder Pediatric Rehab

Teaching, Learning, and Hoping for the Future

They say that those who can’t do, teach. That’s never made much sense to me. How is someone supposed to teach something they’ve never experienced? I mean, you have to at least know the knowledge if you’re trying to pass it on. On the other hand, teaching is just another form of communication, so having a receptive audience does make a huge difference. Luckily for me, the first- through third-grade students enrolled in the Little Village READS summer program at Erie Neighborhood House are definitely there to learn.

Having never worked with children before (or even taught groups in a formal setting, for that matter), I’d been pretty anxious before starting my internship at Erie House. For the week before the students started, my time was occupied by emails, lesson plans, supply checks, book shelving, and everything else I could think of doing to prepare and make sure that the summer would get off to a smooth start; frankly, it had me kind of worried. Not knowing exactly what to expect, I could only fear the worst: brainrotted Gen-Alphas who wouldn’t be able to sit still and focus on anything for more than thirty seconds if it wasn’t plugged into the Internet.

Come Monday, I realized that I couldn’t have been more wrong. As the kids trickled in from drop-off, I did my best to introduce myself and welcome them to what will essentially be their summer school, thinking that they’d be dreading every additional minute in a classroom past the regular academic year’s last bell. Instead, they were immediately finding ways to entertain themselves, looking through our bookshelves, drawing, solving puzzles, and eagerly chatting away with their friends as soon as they walked in the door. Not a screen in sight. One of the boys even asked me if he could go outside to check on the garden and water the vegetables; I was more than happy to oblige him. In that moment, I felt better about the next generation than I ever thought was reasonable.

As the day went on, I got to know the students and see how they learn; not a one of them is without curiosity. Whether it’s from the books they choose for free reading, the way they participate in lessons and projects, or the wide-ranging questions that pop out their heads (what’s the sun made of, where do cicadas come from, Messi or Ronaldo for GOAT, etc.), there is a constant reminder that people really do crave a sort of understanding for the world around them. That shared sense of wonder is precisely why I applied for CAPS in the first place. Teaching or learning, it’s all part of what gives purpose to being human, no matter how old you are. In terms of vocation, personally, I’m just grateful for the opportunity to be a part of that wonder.

  • Lucas Lennen, Erie Neighborhood House

Being Thankful for the Opportunities Presented

This summer I have been working at Jacob’s Ladder, a pediatric rehabilitation clinic in Chesterton, Indiana. I have thoroughly enjoyed my first 3 weeks working there. I am majoring in Healthcare Leadership and am struggling to find what path I want to go into in Healthcare.

Before I started my job, I was excited to work in a clinical setting to really find out, or at least point me in the right direction of a path in my profession. I was also looking forward to using the resources and guidance CAPS provides to reflect on my experiences daily. One thing I realized immediately was that my work was going to take patience and a lot of effort.

A lot of the time, I am doing research for grants, for my organization and organizing the reopening of providing aqua therapy sessions. This is long hours researching equipment, set up, location, and other key aspects for information for grants and aquatherapy.

The other part of my job is shadowing physical therapists during their sessions with children and helping out at some of their camps, especially the wheelchair wars camp, every Friday morning. This is one of my favorite parts of every week and I always look forward to it. I have created a great relationship with one of the campers, Maverick. He is a 6 year old, with trouble walking. I really enjoy my time, working through obstacles and trying, failing, and succeeding. I am only with him for 2 hours every week, but I am always in a great mood after every Friday when I finish working with him. His persistence and positive attitude is infectious and has really helped me reflect on my own actions and decisions, which is a big part of CAPS experience.

As I see Maverick, and the other children, with physical and mental challenges, come to sessions everyday, and continually work to improve and get stronger, I think back to myself, and times I have been ungrateful or taken opportunities for granted. CAPS has pushed me to be more thankful and reflective, everyday that I take time to reflect on both administrative work and therapy. I have been blessed with opportunities in sports and academics my whole life, and I feel that it is easy to often take it for granted, complain, and not give it my all. My experience so far at Jacob’s Ladder, especially with Maverick, has really helped me grow and realize how important it is to be thankful for every opportunity in life, and give it my all, just as Maverick does. 

–by Colin Graves, Jacob’s Ladder

Hope in a Minor Key: Embracing the Timeless Moments of Each Day

In a small town tucked away and hidden by Washington state’s Cascade Mountains, there resides a non-profit organization called Grünewald Guild. This organization offers a wide assortment of community-oriented classes based upon artistic mediums ranging from songwriting, weaving, watercolor, and many others. Due to the absolutely scenic location of the guild, there is a larger influx of students during the summer programs compared to the rest of the year, and the title of this year’s summer program is Waymaking. You may be wondering, “What does waymaking mean?” and this terminology refers to the ability that one has over their unique ways of implementing a personal touch within all of their endeavors. The Guild’s wonderful Executive Director, Sarah Sprouse, is incredibly fascinated with the manner in which rivers are able to consistently adapt and change their path depending on the season or circumstance. The tides of the tenacious rivers always persist, and they make a profound and visible impact on the environment in which they reside. A river forging its own path is a prime example of what it means to be a waymaker, but this metaphor can be easily applied to the journey that all artists pursue. Progress is almost never linear and the journey that every artist pursues demonstrates their commitment to positively impacting themselves and the world around them through their creations. Through the gentle guidance of the guest artists, the guild hopes to aid their students in their goals and objectives within their craft of choice.

Through the CAPS Fellows Program, I have the privilege of working as one of the Communication Interns at Grünewald Guild during their busy Waymaking Summer 2024 program. Through my role as a Communications Intern, I specialize in designing newsletters, writing blog posts, and creating social media guidelines to promote the guild’s core values of art, faith, and community to prospective and returning students. Accompanying this role, I also partake in programming efforts to ensure the general upkeep of the campus. I have been working at the Guild for exactly a month and my experience has been delightful and incredibly enriching; however, there was one aspect of my work experience that I did not expect to encounter.

I feel as though the way that time progresses while at the guild is quite strange to say the least. I have always had an extremely Type A personality and, since I was born and raised on the East Coast, I have always functioned under the jurisdiction of a New York minute. The mentality that was instilled in me since birth was that every task I would undertake must be done perfectly in the most timely manner possible so that I can move quickly onto my next task. I have found that this ideology has become less regional over the years and, unfortunately, has become an almost universal modus operandi. Under these conditions, the importance of art is often overlooked and swept under the rug, but the mission of Grünewald Guild actively combats this utilitarian perspective. 

The Type B approach that Grünewald Guild has to their organizational climate has been a culture shock to me but it is something truly novel. I am encouraged to practice mindfulness and to literally stop and smell the flowers, more specifically the scarlet trumpets, during my time here. The more I have tried to conceptualize the Guild’s peculiar progression of time, the more my mind associates it with the highly remarkable poetry of T.S. Eliot. I am an avid fan of Eliot’s poetry and the piece of literature that began my infatuation with his work was his collection Four Quartets. In this prose, Eliot focuses on the concept of timeless moments and uses vivid imagery to symbolize that time is a series of gray areas. When I first read Four Quartets, I found it difficult to conceptualize the phenomenon of timeless moments that Eliot was illustrating but, through working at the Guild, I realized that the past, present, and future are not wrapped into neat and tidy categories that are to be easily consumed. These three categories are deeply intertwined and inherently dependent on one another, and the most fascinating nuance of this is how casually the connection manifests. I drink water from a mug that was created by Richard Caemmerer, co-founder of Grünewald Guild and former art professor at Valparaiso University, and I breathe in oxygen from trees planted by Liz Caemmerer, co-founder of Grünewald Guild. Richard and Liz Caemmerer paved the way for the success of Grünewald Guild’s pedagogy and this tutelage is rooted in their ideas from the past, intricately preserved in the small joys of the present, and will ultimately transcend into the future. 

As a rising senior at Valparaiso University, one thing that has been weighing heavily on my mind recently is how I would like to indulge in my vocation post-graduation. Through my fascination with the style in which time preserves traditions and philosophies, I have begun looking into opportunities for librarianship and archival work so that I can play an active role in that conservation process. More precisely, I would like to work with music scholarship, collections, and archives in order to safeguard the unbridled power that music holds. As part of my compensation for my work at Grünewald Guild, I was able to take one of their classes completely free of charge and I chose to take the class The Muse, Your Dues, The Fuse: Songwriting with the spectacular singer-songwriter Jan Krist. During the first day of class, Krist said a phrase that has bounced in my head throughout the entire duration of that class. She said that others have described her music as “Hope in a minor key,” and that wording stuck with me due to the sheer complexity of the sentiment. The stories that people hold fall on a spectrum of emotions and, though it is cliché, it is only fitting that art should imitate life. From my scrapped lyrics written in my messy handwriting to the songs of my classmates that I constantly hum, I now carry artifacts of a timeless moment that began with the vision of Richard and Liz Caemmerer back in 1980. 

 

— Jasmine Collins, Communications Intern at Grünewald Guild

A Vocation for Me?

If I leave this Internship with nothing else, it will be the memories of people swept up by purpose. Seeing interns, project managers, and conservation stewards alike inspires me continuously. In my position, the opportunity to see the inner workings of a nonprofit, and the complex world of grants, partners, and funding has presented itself. Additionally, I get to take an inside look at the research, water quality monitoring, and long-term conservation goals of Shirley Heinze Land Trust. 

Despite all these good things, I’ve come across an unsettling issue. The possibility of having a vocation has truly presented itself, and I could find myself swept up by a calling at any time. Vocation is an idea I had never seriously entertained. After all, I am easily contented and have always found happiness in my circumstances.

If you had asked me at any other point in my life about vocation, I might not have had a clear answer. Both of my parents are teachers and are deeply involved in their careers, which provide a significant and emotionally rewarding part of their lives. But for me? I had ruled out the possibility, but I always planned on finding a career and turning it into a calling, rather than being drawn to a path. I reassured myself that my passions and interests would remain, but they would be confined to my own time.

I expected to “learn to love” my job as if it was inevitable that I would work an unfulfilling job. But what if my vocation does exist, and I am drawn towards a path that I cannot pursue for whatever reason? After reflection, I discovered that my thought process had been the following. Never knowing I could have a vocation would be preferable to finding one that’s out of my reach. 

I had assumed that if I were not on the watch for vocation, or allowing myself to feel called to a line of work, I might never be given one. Is that silly, or prudent? In any case, it is certainly not brave, and I realize now that it has been a mechanism for preventing potential dissatisfaction later in life. I had thought I was surrendering when in reality I had taken life into my own hands. The truth is I refused to let myself be vulnerable, and ultimately I may have been dismissing the masks of God for fear of hardship. 

 

Korbin Opfer,

Shirley Heinze Land Trust Intern 

Mountain Lessons: Exploring New Things in New Ways

From the moment I stepped off the Amtrak train in Leavenworth, WA I have been in awe of the landscape around me. The air is fresher, everything is green and taller than any building. The mountains rise up in every direction, completely surrounding us in the plain little valley where the Grünewald Guild is located. We’ve been here three weeks now and I still can’t get over the scenery. The mountains aren’t new to me, I grew up near the Sierra Nevadas, but this feels so much more impressive and wild. They seemed almost too surreal at first. Everywhere I turn it looks like I’m looking at award-winning photos of landscape, it’s hard to believe how extensively beautiful Washington is.

 

While my main goal for this summer was to form new community relationships through service (and I have absolutely done that), my second goal was to explore and learn. I’m in a new environment, and it’s definitely different from Valparaiso. When going out to the woods in the mountains for the summer with the goal of exploring in mind, you tend to think of outdoor activities like hiking, backpacking, camping, swimming, etc. things that put you out in the thick of the outdoors to find a meaningful experience. Friends from home have constantly been asking me if I’ve found any good hiking spots nearby. I have, but I’ve found my own way of exploring the world around me. I wander around the campus with my binoculars to spy on birds, squirrels and the occasional deer. On top of a boulder overlooking the Wenatchee River is my favorite spot for meditation and time to let my mind wander. I’ve learned that not all exploring has to happen in the way you expect though, sometimes the little adventures find you instead of you having to look for them. You can explore through old art pieces stored up in the attic and start to learn the history of the artists who’ve lived and taught here over the decades. Even sitting quietly on the front porch of a cabin can teach you so much. You notice the rain in the bright sunshine that only lasts for five minutes, you hear the birds chirping as they move about in the rustling trees, you meet new people who bike past or stop by for a visit. 

 

The mountains have given me a very interesting lesson. The world can seem too big for us to handle sometimes, it can feel like we’re very small and not able to get very far or like we won’t measure up to the highest peaks. But, taking each day and task slowly and calmly, we can slowly build up ourselves and others. Exploring and learning bit by bit has allowed me to feel more connected to my space here and offered me time for honest, peaceful reflection.

                                                                                                                                                                               

                                                                                                                                                                                 

Building up,

Gabby Unzicker

Grünewald Guild Intern

Finding Beauty In The (Controlled) Chaos

 As I walked into my first staff training and orientation session of my placement, I immediately noticed the passion and drive that the leadership of Camp Lakeside (and by extension Opportunity Enterprises) have for their work. I was excited to join a team that truly cared about the work that they do, as well as the service that they are providing to the community. That being said, the camp environment is one that can be hectic and overwhelming, which was evident even in the orientation process weeks before the wild ride officially started. Camp Lakeside’s main objective is to bridge the gap between typically developing children and peers that aren’t. Simply put, the goal is to create an environment where people of all abilities can come and enjoy the camp experience. With this, I was able to come in as a fresh face with a position that will be able to help aid and create more meaningful experiences.

While the camp season has only just begun, I have had many different opportunities to fulfill my duties of collecting the necessary data for the camp. One of the biggest skills that I have used in the short time that I have been here is the art of creative productivity. In my position of direct observational research, that often means spending a lot of my day, directly or indirectly, interacting with campers. This has meant that, on multiple occasions throughout my week, I am often jumping in on games of “duck, duck, goose”, hanging out at the archery range, or even taking an afternoon boat ride around the lake. 

 

Two other impactful skills that I have learned and used so far in my time at my internship are time management and communication. While most of my duties during the week are typically pretty laid back and casual, there are certain days, typically Thursdays and Fridays, where my job becomes much more fast paced. On these days, I (along with other camp staff) am tasked with conducting surveys of the campers that are on sight for that given week. Conducting these surveys can take some time, especially with the population that I am working with and that the camp serves. With the support of my supervisors Nichole and Walter (affectionately known at camp as “Chief” and “Bullseye”), I have learned to better communicate and explain what it is that I am assessing, and what it means for the future of the camp that comes as a result. 

 

 While it is still very early on in my internship and the work that I am doing, I hope that as time passes throughout the summer that I continue to find deeper appreciation for what it is that I am doing on behalf of Opportunity Enterprises at Camp Lakeside. Much of the work that I get the chance to do will inevitably impact so many families in positive ways, even if I may not get to directly see the fruits of my, and others, labor in the short time that I am here.

 

Representing Opportunity Enterprises and Camp Lakeside, 

Rasheed Jibriel

The Intersection of Passion and Profession

My office is tucked on the second floor of 444 Barker Road, just a stone’s throw away from Lake Michigan. My desk had been haphazardly dragged in front of the room’s only window, and upon my arrival only had one singular occupant, a snake plant that was practically begging for some water. And honestly, three weeks later it doesn’t look much different. A flyer shoved in a drawer, a hair tie that had been long abandoned, maybe a water bottle that had been forgotten during a quick departure. It is apparent to anyone who works in the Barker House that I don’t usually sit at my desk, and that’s something that I’m quite proud of. Let me explain.

 

My arrival 3 weeks ago was followed by a whirlwind of activity. First there was orientation, then an introduction to my coworkers, which in turn was quickly followed by my first staff meeting. I was given project after project, leaving my head whirling and my laptop full of fragmented notes. It became quite clear that the staff at Save The Dunes wore many hats, and worked passionately to keep this non-profit relevant, flourishing, and dependable. And for some odd reason, this shocked me. Not to any fault of their own, but simply because I had forgotten it was possible to work in alignment with your passions. In my mind, my future career and profession (whatever that would end up being) had long been labeled as something that would merely provide me a source of income and perhaps multiple cups of lukewarm break room coffee a day. I didn’t quite dread what was coming, but I certainly wasn’t looking forward to it either. This brought around a question that I had scribbled in my CAPS journal a couple weeks before; where did passions belong in a profession, and vice versa, could a profession truly align to a person’s passions? 

 

And to be honest, I’m still working on an answer. But seeing my coworkers love the environment enough to advocate for it every day sparked a little bit of hope that maybe one day I’ll work in a place like that too. Where I wake up in the morning (or at least most of them) and I’m actually EXCITED to drive to the office and try to make a difference that the average person can see. And you know what? Maybe one person can change just a tiny piece of the world. 

 

 

I don’t intentionally avoid my desk, or leave my desk to get away from my coworkers. It’s just simply that since the very beginning the entire house on 444 Barker Rd has felt like home. The warm, cushioned chair on the sunlit covered porch, the elegant conference room, and the cheery yellow tiles of the kitchen always give me somewhere new and unique to work. My coworkers laughing on the porch or sitting on the couches of the living room are the best company (And truly now feel like family) and the group hikes often leave me content and sunburnt. Why in the world would I ever sit at my desk when there’s so much to learn everywhere else? 

Wishing the weeks would go by slower, 

 

Heather Elwood, 

PROUD Save the Dunes Intern

 

Adjusting to the New: My First Few Weeks Serving the American Red Cross

I entered my internship with the American Red Cross without expectations, mostly because I didn’t know fully what to expect and what I would be working on. I felt excited to try something new and branch out beyond my area of study and my typical skill set, something I had mentioned during the CAPS application process that I wanted to focus on and grow in. So far, I believe that the work I’ve been able to do through the American Red Cross has helped me to see myself and my calling as something greater than one niche thing. I have my hands in many different places, and it’s been refreshing to exercise different skills and ‘muscles’ of my brain to assist with various projects. 

Specifically, I have been working with my wonderful supervisor, Colleen, on various projects relating to the alliance between the American Red Cross of Indiana and Indiana University Health. I am updating the volunteer information packet for the new volunteers from IU Health. I am adding updated information to the packet and also improving the design. Additionally, I am putting together the summer edition of the quarterly newsletter, which involves designing the newspaper and interviewing nurse volunteers to highlight in the newsletter. 

 

Something I am learning, especially having a remote internship, is that just because I don’t see a direct impact of the work I’m doing doesn’t mean that my work isn’t impactful or important. While I may not be able to directly interact with a lot of the volunteers or know who will read the packet and the newsletter, I understand that those resources that I am working on will benefit the network of Red Cross volunteers in one capacity or another. As someone who normally craves instant feedback and honestly, gratification, learning to trust the long-term impact of something I’m creating is a major growth area in these first couple weeks of my internship. 

 

Another growth area from the first few weeks of my internship has been building a practice of discipline. Working remotely means that I need to create a schedule each day, and keep myself on track for certain tasks and projects I need to complete. I have learned a lot about myself, how I work best, and how I can keep myself motivated, especially on the days when I am not as eager to work on things. Having the end goal of completing three hundred hours in the back of my mind has been especially helpful. I even made a paper tracker to cross off the hours I complete, which has been a fun reward at the end of each workday. Keeping myself on track for completing the hours has led to a practice of being more intentional with how I spend my time and a new focus on the importance of routine and prioritization, skills that I can continue to apply throughout the rest of my professional and personal life.

 

All in all, the past few weeks interning with the American Red Cross have been rich in learning opportunities and moments of growth. I am looking forward to what the rest of the summer will bring!

 

  • Grace Roberts, American Red Cross

 

 

Little Moments are Often the Most Breathtaking

I am going to go out on a limb and say that the summertime brings joy to many people. A balanced mixture of sunshine and warm weather has always been the driving factor for my love for summer. Luckily for me, this summer I have the amazing opportunity to enjoy the wonderful joys of summer at Grunewald Guild located in Leavenworth, WA.

During my time as an undergrad at Valpo I have used the summers away from school as a time of self-reflection and intend to do the same this summer. My method of daily self-reflection usually entails asking myself, “What is one memorable thing that has happened today?” Sometimes I can easily pinpoint a moment that stood out to me, but sometimes it takes more time to find a significant moment each day. Whenever I struggle to immediately pinpoint a memorable moment, I am forced to replay the day’s events in my head, often highlighting the little moments that go overlooked in the moment. And now that I am officially beginning my summer at the Guild, I would like to share some of the little moments that I found on my journey out here. 

My summer adventure started off with a connecting train ride into the windy city of Chicago. This initial train ride was my first time on a train and was an excellent precursor to the long 42-hour train ride headed out west. During the ride, I tried to soak in the sights and memories of Northwest Indiana because I wouldn’t see cornfields again for at least a few months. The sight of the fields reminded me of my family and friends that I was leaving behind for the summer. Something as simple as a cornfield helped me reflect about my loved ones and it helped ease the nerves of traveling across the country. 

As the train continued its tracks towards the coast, the passengers were instructed that the train was stopping for a weather delay in Wisconsin Dells, WI. What was initially a 45-minute delay turned into a 2-hour long conversation with other passengers, including another CAPS Fellow. At first the weather delay seemed to put a damper on the trip but turned out to be quite the opposite. It got passengers talking and cracking jokes to one another to pass the time. Through the mutual connection of being stuck on the train and the less-than-ideal weather, many bonds were created through passengers. Some of these bonds lasted for the remainder of the trip in the form of having a buddy to talk to during maintenance stops along the route. Again, something that many may see as insignificant or even detrimental ended up being one of the highlights of the journey. 

While my journey out west has concluded for the time being I will continue to make every day memorable. Whether it is a fun conversation or taking a few extra moments to look at flowers, there will be no moment overlooked – no matter how little they seem.

  • Corey McClure, Grunewald Guild

Surprise Feathers, or Cultivating Prophetic Voice

Yellow Thighed Finch, Costa Rica

As we explore questions of leadership and service at Valpo, we talk a lot about leadership in times of complexity and challenge, or serving the world’s deep needs.  While it is valuable and necessary to think about how we can change things for the better, our leadership and service must also be marked by a humility that understands that “we” might not have the right answers, or the tools necessary to “fix,” and that we might actually need to change something about ourselves, rather than about the world.

More to the point, what happens when we see the world as good as we lead and serve?  What happens when we see those we seek to serve as having assets, resources and capital that we ourselves might not have?  Does anything change?

In my capacity as a Lutheran Deaconess, I was recently invited to share with students of the Lutheran Diaconal Association at Valparaiso University on the topic of one of our diaconal hallmarks: Prophetic Voice.  This powerful hallmark reads:

“Individually and as a community, the diaconate points to God’s vision of shalom (peace, wholeness, and salvation) for the whole creation. Through action and word, the diaconate raises a prophetic voice, calling and recalling the church to its diaconal task, advocating with those whose voices have not yet been heard, exposing injustice and oppression and reminding all God’s people that in God’s realm the least is the greatest. Lest they lose sight of God’s vision of shalom, members of the diaconate also remain open to the prophetic voice of others, especially those on the margins, who challenge them to remain faithful to their diaconal call.” 

Specifically, the diaconal students were looking at this point in the hallmark: “A Deaconess/Deacon identifies personal power and cultural privilege, using these as opportunities to lift up those caught in cycles of powerlessness and oppression.”

Susan L Maros points out in her book, Calling in Context, that it’s often harder to see our own power, and easier to see where we feel our power is lacking.  In situations where we are the ones with personal power and cultural privilege, how do we learn to identify this and to listen to the abundance present in the world, to the voices of those who have assets and resources we have never considered?

Rabbi Abraham Heschel, an inspiration and mentor for Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr, writes in the introduction to his book on the Prophets that the key attitude to cultivating a prophetic stance is to be “sensitive to God’s spirit” and to “know what we see rather than see what we know.”

What does this mean, knowing what we see rather than seeing what we know?  I am reminded of the time that I was bird watching in a Costa Rican cloud forest, practicing my binocular skills with some US university students.  I saw a gray bird in a cypress tree, looking quite unremarkable.  I almost walked right by.  Then I used my binoculars and saw that the bird actually had bright yellow “pants,” feathers along its legs that are a delightful surprise.  This aptly-named Yellow Thighed Finch is endemic to Costa Rica and Panama, and thus by identifying it upon closer inspection I was able to see a bird that very few people in the world actually get to see.  

How many times have we assumed we knew what we were looking at, whether it be a bird, or a political question, or a conversation with our partner or other relative?  How often do we take the time for a closer look?  How often do we stick with it long enough to be surprised?  

The particular challenge of the diaconal hallmark comes when we are asked to identify personal power and cultural privilege.  Those of us with a lot of power and privilege don’t get our assumptions questioned very often.  It can be easy to run roughshod over others through simple “privilege inertia” that allows us to plow forward even if what we are doing is nonsensical, or at worst, harmful to others.  When we come from a position of personal privilege and cultural power, standing for God’s shalom means problematizing our own position, and practicing humility and justice.  

Can we with power and privilege come to know better what we see, and be humbled by the bright yellow feathers on the seemingly simple, gray bird?  And when we notice and understand the strength held by others, how does this change our behavior?  

A friend recently pointed out that people who speak two languages are not often credited with the unique strength that is being bilingual.  Bilingualism brings with it many more benefits than simply being able to speak two languages.  The US Department of Education points out that bilingual people have better critical thinking skills, are better at remembering information, have an easier time with math and logic, and can more easily understand and learn more languages.  They can code switch between cultures, understand divergent viewpoints, and even identify more emotions and ideas due to the fact that they have a larger vocabulary overall.  And yet, in our society students with a first language other than English are seen as “behind” in school, Deaf people are losing access to ASL in school, and high-stakes standardized tests are built for monolingual English speakers, failing to showcase the strengths of bilingual people.

What other areas have you noticed where characteristics that are largely seen as deficits might actually be assets?  How does changing our mind about these characteristics open us to promoting God’s shalom in our communities?  

 

-by Deaconess Kat Peters, M.Ed, M.A, Assistant Director of the Institute for Leadership and Service

Photo credit: By Cephas – Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=34218026

Making Space for Questions and Complexity

Last week, I had the privilege of conversing with Dr. Kevin Gary’s CORE 115 students, who are exploring “Vocation and the Good Life” through their reading, discussion, and writing this semester. College can be such a rich space for delving into these questions, particularly at Valpo, and I was deeply curious. What were they mulling over? What did they think it might mean to live well?  How were they seeking to  understand and discern a sense of vocation or purpose? What sort of conversation were they having, with writers and with each other, to get at  such questions in earnest?

 

In our discussion, students brainstormed, teasing out the defining elements of “vocation” and a “good life” from their previous reading and reflection. They highlighted the importance of intentionality and humility in cultivating a deeper sense of joy or contentment (as opposed to chasing happiness). They mentioned how crucial self-reflection and awareness are, and how we must lean into growth (and sometimes discomfort) to discern and live well. We also reflected on role models and communities that anchor and orient us, the ways we are called outside of ourselves, and how–for many–faith underpins even trying to frame these questions at all. Suffice it to say, they were pondering and synthesizing an impressive range of potent ideas–ideas that suggested more fulfilling ways of being in the world, ways of leading and serving with intention.

 

Exploring such questions and concepts isn’t tidy and easily determined. Indeed, it’s not something you can assume you’ll have fully figured out at twenty two, or even thirty five or seventy for that matter (see “humility” above).  But then again, exploring questions that continue to yield nuance and new insights across your life should be part of the point of college. We invite these questions in many places on this campus. It’s happening through informal conversations, advising meetings, student org groups, and cafeteria lunches, as well as in classrooms. I’m grateful that we as a campus community can cultivate space for that reflective work in all sorts of environments and contexts. Because, as most of us already know, that sort of deeper engagement can be hard to find time for elsewhere.   

 

In a recent book project, Meghan Sullivan and Paul Blaschko compellingly differentiate between the approach to what they label the “surveyed life” versus one rooted in reflection and examination, suggesting that there is a persistent pull to skate on the surface rather than probe the depths of messier complexities: 

 

“This survey approach is everywhere in our lives right now. And in the right doses, it can be healthy. Although the constant data collection and behavioral management can get a bit intrusive, there’s a reason we let our phones count our steps, monitor our heart rates, remind us to meditate, and organize reports in easy-to-digest diagrams. . . . Still, the survey approach is radically insufficient to address the bigger questions. A well-lived life is integrated and thoughtful; it doesn’t consist in robotically conforming our lives to whatever the data suggests at the moment…” (9-10). 

 

To put this another way, as much as we might wish or pretend otherwise, we can’t life-hack our way to purpose. Information is not the same as insight. There isn’t “one weird trick” that can magically transport us to a good life.

 

Rather, we’re called to something more interesting and complicated: an iterative process of discovery and engagement, experiences of reflection and practice that move us beyond ourselves. I know I’m still figuring it out, in community and with the gift of good conversation partners–among them, first-year students raising thoughtful points about vocation on a recent Tuesday morning.

 

–Dr. Anna Stewart, ILAS Director

Calling is not a straight line

When I was a Valpo student, vocation was often discussed in my circles as being the place where one’s “deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet.”  This is a classic statement from Frederick Buechner.  It’s shorthand, while also holding important meaning.  In fact, Buechner helpfully gives some practice examples of this, suggesting that writing cigarette ads might be fun but probably not helpful, and that being a doctor in a leper colony is very helpful, but if it drains your joy then may not be your best-fit vocation.

 

The image that this formula always brings to my mind is that of a cross-hairs: two straight lines that find a center, a bullseye.  The world’s need on the x-axis, my gladness on the y-axis.  In this image, as an undergraduate, I found a target with a point system, like the archery targets I used to practice on at summer camp.  Miss the mark, lose the game.  If I cannot find my center, my purpose, will my life be worth living?

In my work in development studies, we confront the same problem – how to define development, how to measure it?  One key problem to the idea of development is that it necessitates the existence of “underdeveloped” places and people, those who need to be brought into alignment with a “better” way of life.  There is a target, and you can hit the mark, or miss it.

This may not be Buechner’s intent, and a charitable reading will give him the benefit of the doubt.  Hopefully everyone can find themselves at this crossroads.  But images bring with them connotations, and this image of the axes connotes targets, success, failures.  What if a different image were a little more helpful?

Valpo is also home to several labyrinths.  There are two outdoor labyrinths, one located on the east side of the Chapel of the Resurrection, and one at the Lutheran Diaconal Association center.  There is also an indoor, portable canvas labyrinth, which was used at a session for MLK Day in January on spiritual resources for action and contemplation.

As Travis Scholl (‘96), the author of Walking the Labyrinth: A Place to Pray and Seek God and the presenter at the MLK Day session, eloquently points out, a labyrinth is the opposite of a straight line.  In fact, the center of the labyrinth is not located at the crosshairs, and the way to the center takes the longest and most circuitous route possible within the space.  Moreover, the center of the labyrinth is not a dot, but an empty place.  

What does this mean for our journey of understanding our purpose and calling?  As many of us can attest, years or decades after college graduation, life does not play out in a series of straight lines.  If we find a magical “bullseye” where we feel fulfilled, glad, and useful, this feeling may not last or it may not be present every day.  

Scholl tells us that the empty center of the labyrinth demonstrates the emptiness of our clichés and our pieties, and calls us to understand that all we can do in our search for purpose is to find ourselves in the present moment.  In that moment we find ourselves face to face not with our definitions, aspirations, or accomplishments, but with our Creator, who tells us that we were created for just this moment, that we are enough.  No instructions beyond that.  That simple, and that difficult.  

Where our previous ideas told us we fell short, that we are lacking, in the center of the labyrinth all that we have walked before comes to fruition in the moment, and meets the moment, if only we can trust.  

And then, rather than congratulating ourselves for hitting the target, we walk the long and winding path back out into the world to live and act in the present moment, having experienced the center.

  • by Kat Peters, Assistant Director of the Institute for Leadership and Service
  • Photo credit Pastor Kate Museus

The Division of Calling and Spiritual Life (ILAS and the Chapel) is working with campus partners this Lent and this spring to bring the canvas labyrinth to different corners of the university.  We invite you to watch for this labyrinth, or to visit the outdoor labyrinths east of the Chapel and in the garden of the Lutheran Diaconal Association Center.  We invite you to take the first step, to take one step at a time, to reach the center of your life.

Cross-Purposes at the Threshold

 

 

It’s that time of year—in the calendar and in the rhythm of college life—when we instinctively look ahead.  Perhaps we declare a resolution to those around us, or search out an app to download that will help us track and manage our habits.  (Our consumption culture has just finished a season of encouraging us to indulge, after all, and now we’re exhorted to take control so that adds some pressure, too.)

 

On college campuses, soon-to-be graduating seniors are often peering more earnestly into the future, as well—perhaps finalizing applications or awaiting graduate school decisions; seeking to network and interview for positions that are still coming into focus; wondering with a mix of excitement and uncertainty about a position that they may have already secured; navigating relational commitments and how best to live into them in this next period; recalibrating as plans shift.

 

In all this, possibilities beckon, sometimes pulling in quite different directions.

 

I often think of these as “threshold moments” (a term I’m not alone in embracing but one whose genesis is unclear to me). This metaphor implies a rich backstory with any number of experiences that have formed and shaped us, and we’re about to walk into a new space, still connected to what came before but also distinctly its own.  In my personal experience, thresholds stir up all sorts of emotions because I’m more keenly aware of being poised between past and future, moving forward and looking back. If I’m being honest, my life is a series of these thresholds, and not just at the big milestone markers like graduation. Thresholds always seem to loom larger, though, when accompanied with extra signposting and expectation.

 

Lately, I’ve been privileged to share thoughtful, searching conversations with several seniors approaching graduation as they weigh options and an abiding desire to live fully and meaningfully into their values while embracing a sense of purpose. Even if they are still discovering more about themselves everyday (as we all are), they can eloquently describe what they care about, what they are good at, and what is life-giving for them as individuals and as community members engaged in broader concerns…but how precisely do you fit those pieces together?  What shape does it make?  How do you choose this shape over that one? 

 

I can hear my own deliberations echoed in these questions, and even though I recognize it as a fallacy, I feel the pull of single, simple answers. We seek clarity and certainty. It must be this…just one clear thing, please.

 

It is both fortunate and frustrating that our purpose is more complex and more multi-faceted, that it can’t be neatly winnowed down to one role, that it resists the bounds of being defined by just position or career. This is actually life-giving news (even if it doesn’t always feel that way). It translates into the abundance of “both/and” possibilities, eschewing the logic of “either/or.”

 

In my conversations with college students, it seems to me that they often perceive their threshold as a front door as they leave the relatively safe confines of home or college life for a wide and somewhat unfamiliar world. In these sorts of moments, we are called to the present, to paying attention and responding as we discern and take the best next step. But that step doesn’t have to be perfect or permanently defining. One of the lessons that I personally take away from Christianity and the Lutheran heritage of this particular place is that we are not fully defined by where we find ourselves. There is a God who travels beyond all thresholds—there in our spaces of home and comfort, there on the open road, always with us and holding us.

For me, the words from what our family calls the Holden Prayer ring true at the threshold. We are called to “ventures of which we cannot see the ending, by paths as yet untrodden.” We are invited to a next step on still unfolding journeys.

 

–by Dr. Anna Stewart, Director of the Institute for Leadership & Service

Discerning Calling and Purpose

Why are we here?  What is my purpose in life?  Who am I and how do I show up in the world?  These are a few of the very big questions that we ask around here, in the Division of Calling and Spiritual Life, at Valparaiso University, at the Institute for Leadership and Service, in the church.

I admit, there are days when these questions are a little too big for me, to the point of being incomprehensible or illogical.  In fact, the older I get, the less I profess to know, as Anne Lamott points out in her recent essay on knowing less and less every year.

What to do when we look around at society?  What are we supposed to do with a refugee crisis that is sending thousands of people into our cities and towns every day?  What are we supposed to do with wars that find their way to our streets and campuses?  What purpose can we find in climatic events that destroy homes, livelihoods, and political stability?

Does the concept of Christian vocation stand up to these deep challenges?

Jennifer Grant Haworth provides helpful direction in her chapter entitled “Discerning God’s Call,” in the volume On Our Way: Christian Practices for Living a Whole Life, edited by Dorothy C. Bass and Susan R. Briehl.   Haworth does not suppose that living into our callings, or vocations, will somehow solve all of the world’s problems, or tell us which path to choose after graduation.  Rather, she describes vocation as a “call from God to love and grow in love – with self, others, and God” (p. 37).

We can do this through a centuries-old Christian practice known as discernment.  Here is how Haworth describes the practice:

“Through individual reflection and conversation with others, the Christian practice of discernment invites us (1) to pay attention to our daily experience and what it stirs in us; (2) to reflect on what we notice there, sorting and sifting in order to understand what is leading to greater life and love and what is not; and (3) to take loving action on what we have learned” (p. 41).

Susan L. Maros, for her part in her book Calling and Context,  reminds us that this process of discernment has to do with work that God is already doing in the world.  We are listening for this transforming work, and looking for how our own experience and formation equips us to be a part of God’s work.

It turns out that this process of vocational discernment is not so much future-oriented as it is a practice of being in the present moment, of paying attention, reflecting, and then acting when the Spirit urges.  We also consider our past formation, understanding that God is preparing and equipping us all along to meet the present moment.

Recently, a group of Lutheran Christians in Valparaiso that I know discerned that they will support a Venezuelan refugee family who is trying to make their way to the United States.  For now, this support meant lending two names to a document of “US Contact Persons.” While sitting in the meeting where this was decided, I was struck by how the group relied on their past experiences, knowledge, and formation, and how they carefully listened to God’s voice in the wider situation and in each other, telling them that they are ready to take on this challenge.  

A different group, with a different past, would not come to the same conclusion.  Yet this group has had past formation through helping other refugee families, through visiting Central America and hearing refugee stories firsthand, through their connections with agencies and individuals in Valparaiso who know how to help make things happen for folks in need.  

This group had prayed for a chance to serve in their own community, and had prayed for a chance to help refugees, and God provided the opportunity.  They still don’t know when or even if the family will be able to make it to the United States, but they are living out their calling in the moment, responding to promptings of the Spirit, making the next small step in faith toward an unknown future.

Sometimes (most times!) those big and lofty questions of calling and vocation point us to exactly where we are, to some unexpected and yet usually obvious (in hindsight) answer of where God is already acting.  Much like the song by Will Todd sung by the Valparaiso University Chorale at Christmas at Valpo this past weekend: 

 

“Shepherds, called by angels,

Called by love and angels;

No place but a stable.

My Lord has come.

 

Sages, searching for stars

Searching for love in heaven;

No place for them but a stable.

My Lord has come.

 

His love will hold me,

His love will cherish me,

Love will cradle me.

 

Lead me, lead me to see him,

Sages and shepherds and angels;

No place for me but a stable.

My Lord has come.”

 

In our Division of Calling and Spiritual Life, we are currently accepting applications to our summer fellowship program called the Calling and Purpose in Society (CAPS) Fellows Program.  This is an opportunity to live out a calling in the moment, but also to practice the steps of discernment and deep listening, to learn about situations in the world that require attention and response.  The experience will prepare students to approach future issues of calling and purpose with tools of reflection, community, and a responsive attitude.  

If you or someone you know are interested in the CAPS Program, you can find more information on our website, or write to us at lead.serve@valpo.edu

-by Deaconess Kat Peters, M.Ed., M.A., Assistant Director of the Institute for Leadership and Service

Lavishing Attention in Uncertain Times

Lately, I’ve been stopping to admire the light a lot.  The way autumnal light, beaming lower on the horizon, bathes the crimsons, ambers, and golds of trees this time of year.  Earlier dusks painting the sky in clear, breathless beauty as I walk to my car under increasingly bare tree limbs.  The warmth of a single candle flickering by the sofa – one among many antidotes to those fast-darkening evenings and the chilly mornings when I rise.  The pastel hues of my daughter’s miniature lava lamp, casting patterns across her ceiling at bedtime to ward off unwelcome shadows.

These may be small details, observations half-formed in a midday or mid-evening moment, but for me they are also potent reminders – calling me to pay attention to the world around me, to the sacred and the small, to the reverence such details and moments can invite.

In An Altar in the World: A Geography of Faith, writer Barbara Brown Taylor delves lyrically into how being intentional, purposeful, and fully present not only grounds us as human beings but points us toward God and deeper meaning.  In one of the book’s chapters, “The Practice of Paying Attention,” she describes the virtue of cultivating reverence, a practice she now recognizes that she encountered early in her childhood:

“From [my father] I learned by example that reverence was the proper attitude of a small and curious human being in a vast and fascinating world of experience. This world included people and places as well as things. Full appreciation of it required frequent adventures, grand projects, honed skills, and feats of daring. Above all, it required close attention to the way things worked, including one’s own participation in their working or not working.” [19]

Brown Taylor draws on philosopher Simone Weil (among other writers and thinkers), braiding together considerations from several religious traditions as she ponders how truly paying attention – or with a nod to my own English-major desire for verbs with flair! – lavishing attention on the people, places, and things around us can open us up to reverence. Those seemingly small details just might contain multitudes.

In other words, what might at first blush seem like pausing to consider the trivial in fact becomes a path to something far bigger.

Paraphrasing another philosopher, Brown Taylor muses that reverence (borne out of a kind of sustained attention) is ultimately “the recognition of something greater than the self – something that is beyond human creation or control, that transcends full human understanding.”  Reverence, she writes, “stands in awe of something – something that dwarfs the self, that allows human beings to sense the full extent of our limits – so that we can begin to see one another more reverently as well.” [21] 

As a lifelong lover of literature and a longtime teacher, I found additional appreciation for this cycle of attention and reverence, walking students through complex texts and guiding them through the practices of close reading. Carefully attending to details, small moments, nuance, and texture – truly lavishing attention, even between the covers of a novel–can open us up to one another. Reading narratives this way can help us to also read the world, inviting us into one another’s stories. These practices of close reading, in books and in life, help us reckon with our limits even as we also celebrate our part in a human story far greater than our own.

A little over two weeks ago, I was preparing a brief homily for Monday Morning Prayer.  Drawing on the Division of Calling and Spiritual Life’s “Reset/Refresh” theme as well as the year’s morning prayer series “This is How I Sabbath (or Try To),” I decided to reflect on how Sabbath-time can summon us toward this sort of lavish attention. 

 

The scripture for the morning, Psalm 104, delights in the reverent details. The psalmist imagines:

“the sea, vast and spacious, 

teeming with creatures beyond number–

living things both large and small. 

The ships go to and fro…”

Even a sea-monster appears, “frolicking” in the expansive ocean. 

 

The psalm offers a beautiful meditation on how lavishing attention can reorient us, pulling us into reverence.  I found myself pondering and grappling with this anew when, the day before the scheduled Monday Morning Prayer homily, our campus community learned that one of our students had been violently attacked and rushed to a hospital across the state for critical care.

Tomorrow we will gather as a campus to remember Varun Raj Pucha, who tragically died of those injuries, and to lift up his life.  I did not have the privilege of knowing Varun, but I have been grateful for glimpses of him carried through the words of his family, friends, and professors. The pieces of his story and others’ memories of him do not constitute his life, all that he was, or all that he was in the process of becoming. But they can offer us a chance to attend, to revere even as we say goodbye, to gather around a few powerful reminders of a beautiful story that was still being written and of a reverence that beckons us all.

-by Dr. Anna Stewart, ILAS Director

Photo credit: Amy Smessaert, Lutheran Diaconal Association