Valpo Voyager

Student Stories from Around the World

Tag: feelings of going home

Chao Valparaíso! Espero que nos vemos pronto!

 

The beach at Laguna Verde and cliff we camped on top of!

View of the mountains from the bus!

El grupo! Love these people 🙂

 

‘WOW. It’s my last day in Valparaso,Chile. This is weird. It’s definitely not sinking in yet…and I don’t think it will for awhile. It’s just not a definitive goodbye, seeing as I’m off tomorrow to Santiago to see Avril Lavigne in concert (yup…you heard right…how hilarious is that?!?!?! Tickets are so cheap here, WOOOO!) and then off to Buenos Aires for 5 days and then La Paz for a week. So it’s not like my adventures in South America are ending, and I am SO excited to travel and actually be on vacation all the time…so the fact that I’m leaving Valpo just isn’t stinging as much!

But I’ve had some really great last moments here. I’ve been racing around to see the touristy places that I just haven’t gotten around too, and I went to this awesome museum in Vina del Mar that had tons of artifacts and information on the history of the Mapuche Indians, the indigenous people here in Chile, and Easter Island, they even had a real Moai statue from Easter Island outside! I took a day trip to visit Isla Negra, one of Pablo Neruda’s houses, and it was incredible! I was just geeked out to see the house of one of my favorite poets…but I didn’t realize it was going to be so beautiful! And of course, this is the one time I leave my camera in my room, UGH! But he built his house on the cliff overlooking the ocean, with an amazing, rocky beach below. I never knew that he was a collector as well, but his house is filled with collections of anything to do with sailing, things from Chile’s history and indigenous people and just random collections, like glass table feet and pipes! Getting to drink coffee while overlooking the ocean on Pablo Neruda’s porch, and then going to lay a flower on his grave? Priceless 🙂 That same weekend we took another day trip with the Curso de Lideres youth group here at the YMCA to travel up the mountains in search of….SNOW! All the Chileans were ECSTATIC for snow, most of them had never seen it before, how lucky are they?! (haha, I hate cold!) So even though I was not as enamored with the snow, it was pretty funny to see their reactions, and the mountains were incredibly beautiful.

Speaking of great last moments, I just got back from an epic goodbye party thrown by Mauricio, the director of the center we work at in Las Cañas, in which we trekked out to Laguna Verde, these absolutely GORGEOUS cliffs and beach and waterfalls, and pitched tents to camp for the night…in the middle of winter…bahahahahaha 🙂 But it was so much fun! Our tent was on the top of this huge cliff that overlooked the ocean and we hiked down it the next day in order to spend time at the beach. We also ventured to see a small waterfall, which was one of the more treacherous hikes of my life (if any Hope Church AT hikers are reading this, my trail experiences served me well!). There was pretty much no trail, just mud, rocks, thorns and rivers to cross…madness! But really fun 🙂 The best part for me was getting to roast hot dogs and make smores over the fire, it felt like summer! (Ok, I was wearing 3 shirts, a hoodie, a sweatshirt, scarf, coat, 2 pairs of leggings and two pairs of sweatpants….but still!). Our Chilean friends had never had smores before, and graham crackers don’t exist here…so Johnna found some sweet, square cookies and we went with it! I thought they were delicious, I miss making smores with my family in our backyard firepit so much!

I’m going off to serve at the soup kitchen for the last time this afternoon, preparing myself for tears….the people who work at Las Cañas have really become my family here, they crack me up, have seen me cry, give me advice and are just wonderful friends. I’m gonna  miss them a ton. Plus, I’m sad to leave the soup kitchen. I love having my English students tell me “Thank you Mees (how they pronounce “Miss” :D), this looks good!” when I serve them food and I love that I know so many faces by this point and receive hugs and greetings wherever I walk in the center. It’s been a gradual goodbye process, from center to center and program to program…but this is really it…still not hitting home! :-/

I’m doing 2 posts today before leaving, so check out the next one too! I should have internet this weekend in Santiago, and the hostel we’re staying at in Buenos Aires is supposed to have wi-fi, so hopefully I’ll be able to keep blogging as I’m traveling, but it’s going to be a little more up in the air from now on. Wish me luck on my travels, I can’t wait!

Messed Up

I feel messed up, just a combination of many feelings that I’m slowly trying to figure out.

In less than one month, I will be returning to the United States. How do I feel about this? Sad, scared, worried, relieved, happy, excited…yeah, all that in about 10 seconds.

I just don’t get it. Mexico has been one difficult pillow to swallow at times. I’ve never been through more of a scary financial situation than while being here (penniless and abroad? not fun!) along with painful language barriers, difficult classes and people, sickness, and oh yeah, forget to mention my laptop broke down 3 times down here.

However, for whatever crazy reason, I love Mexico and wouldn’t take anything back. I feel such a tie to this culture that has made me question my cultural identity. Although the US is my home country and I love it, Mexico just fits me better.

This culture has given me new life and a fresh perspective towards it. The culture here is so rich and vibrant and the land is beautiful although there are negative aspects to it (hello coruption!). However, there is nothing like Latin American culture-it just forces you to feel something. I feel sexier in Mexico because I feel the confidence to just be myself and forget what people say. Oh yeah, and people always tell you here “poco a poco, tranquilo“…little by little, take it easy. That little phrase can do wonders to your soul.

However, I haven’t seen my family since August. We call on skype (without the webcam) but they aren’t able to visit me and I never expected to stay here another semester (and didn’t plan on not going home for Christmas). I miss my mom so much and want her hugs and want to get ice cream with my dad.

I just don’t know. It’s messed up feeling this way. In love with one culture and wishing to return to it but on the other hand, feeling so empty because you want your family and friends and want to be in YOUR familiar territory.

(Sigh) I don’t know what to do…it’s just messed up.

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